The Ugly Jog
I’m now twenty weeks out from my quadriceps tendon repair surgery. I have been pool running for a few weeks and can walk almost completely normally now. I even started jogging a bit, just to see what my leg can do.
As you might imagine, my attempt at jogging is rather ugly. I call it jogging because 1) it sure ain’t running and 2) I am jogging in the literal meaning of the term. The main thing is that my left leg doesn’t quite recall how to run, so it sort of catches a bit-thus the jogging.
Not surprisingly, the effect is a rather ugly one. No, I don’t mean how I look, although my jealous detractors might say otherwise (yes, I mean you). Mainly it is ugly because it is, well, ugly. Being sensible and sensitive to others, I try to practice my jogging out of the sight of others by sticking to the woods. Of course, sometimes people do see me.
Person:“Say, son are y’all okay? Did a possum bite your leg or maybe a rattlesnake? Or is you having one of them there seizure things? I hope not, you know that Obama’s health care plan is to euthanize sick people. Just like those Nazis.”
Me: “Nah. I’m just trying to learn how to run again. I had knee surgery a while back.”
Me: “Hey, it isn’t that bad.”
Person: “Son, if y’all could see it, you’d know I’m a’speaking God‘s own truth. Its a wonder He doesn’t put you down. You know, in all His mercy and that. If ya want, I kin get my shooting iron and put yer down.”
Me: “I’m good.”
Person: “Suit yerself son. I’m goin ta avert my eyes now while ya hobble away. My dawg is to.”